Bouncing Back from Rejection

» Posted by on Feb 8, 2017 in Alpha Blog | 0 comments

Bouncing Back from Rejection

Everyone faces rejection of some sort at some point in their lives. Surprisingly, many well-adjusted and confident adults can have major emotional or mental setbacks due to rejection. While most people anticipate and understand that rejection is a part of life, many are not able to process or easily move on from rejections. Here is a quick list of things that will help you overcome rejection you may face in your life.

  • BE KIND TO YOURSELF. This is pretty simple, but very important when it comes to dealing with rejection. when someone is already sensitive to rejection, they often are not very good at self-love and self-compassion. If you can truly become comfortable and happy with who you are, it will be easier for you to stay positive about yourself when a rejection happens. Rather than focusing on your flaws that contributed to the rejection, try focusing on the positive qualities that you have.
  • GIVE YOURSELF SOME TIME. It is a normal response to want to “fix” or understand what you did wrong to cause rejection. But analyzing a situation right after it has happened, especially while you are still emotional, is not helpful or productive. The best thing you can do is give yourself a few days before going over the situation. Time can help your emotions calm down and give you a more rational perspective on the experience, which will allow you to see things that you could have done differently rather than just falling down an emotional blackhole.
  • IDENTIFY YOUR FEELING. Rather than just being upset and dwelling on how bad you feel, identify what emotion the rejection has actually caused you to feel. Do you feel sad? Scared? Angry? Identifying what emotion you are actually feeling can help you identify why this rejection has affected you so much, and can help you process through it. Rather than just continuing to feel bad about yourself, it can help you see that the rejection is a situation, and your emotion is a reaction to that situation. Then you can begin to deal with the emotion and get past it.
  • GIVE YOURSELF SOME CREDIT. Yes rejection is hard, but it is also inevitable. The only way to avoid ever being rejected? Never taking a risk, putting yourself out there, or always settling for a safe bet. While this may seem like an easier way to go, keep in mind that believing in yourself and reaching for something beyond what is currently available is what leads to greatness ultimately. Sure maybe it didn’t work out this time, but at least you are not just content and settling. Give yourself some credit and kudos for trying to achieve or obtain something greater, and for having enough ambition to attempt to better yourself and your situation.
  • DO NOT LET REJECTION DEFINE YOU. Just because someone didn’t like your idea doesn’t mean they don’t like you, it just means that idea wasn’t what they needed at the time. Even if the rejection was directed at you, for example by a potential love interest, it likely has less to do with you than with the other person. Keep in mind that humans generally gravitate toward things that will benefit them or fulfill their needs first. So even if you are the smartest, most attractive, rich, and successful person a love interest may still reject you. Maybe they don’t need any of those things, and are only looking for someone who loves bowling. Again, it has very little to do with you and much more to do with them. Try to view rejections as a situation that the fit wasn’t perfect, rather than you’re a bad person or undeserving.

If you have recently gone through a rejection and are having a hard time dealing with it, please contact us today. We have therapists that are available to help you!

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