Top Relationship Communication Needs

» Posted by on Oct 6, 2017 in Alpha Blog | 0 comments

Top Relationship Communication Needs

Most people know that being in a relationship requires some work and a lot of communication. While communication is a pretty standard part of all relationships, most people struggle with why they need to communicate and what needs to be communicated when. There isn’t a one-size-fits all answer to this, as each relationship is different. However, there are some common threads that will run through most relationships. Keep reading to find out the top reasons communication are a must for a successful relationship and the most important topics to discuss.

Why Communication Matters

Besides the obvious, which is to have any sort of relationship you must be able to communicate with another person, there are some reasons that communication is key to success in your relationship. For one thing, good healthy communication serves as a foundation for understandind and stability. If you and your partner can effectively communicate, you will be able to know where you stand in your relationship. Knowing where you stand with someone and where the other person’s head is at can be so beneficial to your peace of mind and to your relationship. Knowing where you stand allows you to feel stable and to set realistic expectations for each other.

Besides allowing for stability, good communication makes relationships more meaningful. This should be a given, but many people overlook and totally ignore this idea. But think about your closest friend or the person that you trust the most. You likely have had in depth conversations with them, which is part of why you feel so close to them. Sharing thoughts, feelings, and sensitive information with your partner allows you to feel closer to them. And ultimately, when your partner keeps your conversations private it adds a sense of security and intimacy to your relationship that you won’t have with anyone else. This also adds to your trust in your partner and your relationship.

 

Important Things to Discuss

EXPECTATIONS. From the very beginning, it is important to have clear expectations of what you want out of your relationship to ensure that both people are heading the same direction with similar goals. While you don’t need to explain your 5 year plan and describe your dream house on your first date, gauging each others’ goals early on can help you decide if your partner is a good match. Additionally if you both can discuss your overall goals in the relationship, whether it be just dating, getting married, having children, etc. you can ensure that neither of you are wanting something that the other can’t or won’t give. This will help you both in the long run because it will avoid future arguments and resentments over not meeting or understanding what your partner wanted from the beginning.

INSECURITIES. While you don’t need to describe every detail and text conversation of your previous relationships, it is healthy and helpful to discuss any major events or deciding factors of previous relationships. Many people tend to think that speaking about exes is a bad idea in a relationship, and that can be true if the relationship is fairly new. But once you have started a solid relationship, if you do have insecurities because of previous events, it may be helpful to explain that to your partner. Keep in mind, having experienced a traumatic situation in a previous relationship does NOT mean you have a pass to carry that baggage into your new relationship. But it can be helpful to explain why certain things make you uncomfortable or anxious. Additionally even if your insecurity has nothing to do with previous relationships and only is about something within yourself, sharing that with your partner can add to understanding and can even help you move past it.

INTIMACY. In most adult romantic relationships you will have some form of intimacy. What this means to you and your partner is a highly individualized experience. Because of this, it is important to discuss wants, needs, and boundaries openly and honestly with your partner. While such conversations can seem embarassing or uncomfortable, keep in mind that the more you discuss this side of your relationship the more comfortable you both will be with it.

GOALS. Whether you have individual goals or relationship goals, communicating these to your partner is important. Discussing your aspirations can help your partner understand what motivates your and what you value the most. Also having your partner accept those goals can help you feel validated and understood. Additionally having relationship goals that your partner is unaware of can really add up to disappointment. Because goals are usually a personal thing, you can’t expect your partner to just assume or know your goals. Communicate these with them so you can include them in your plans and aspirations.

FINANCES. Finances can be a touchy subject because it typically represents much more than just your account balance. While this subject can be hard to discuss, it is important that serious couples explore their financial situation, beliefs, and values prior to combining finances. Not having a good talk about these things beforehand can lead to a lot of arguments and misunderstandings.

 

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